3 Steps (Experiments) to Do before Utilizing ANY Anxiety-Reducing Technique

Step 1: write it down 

Capture your anxious thoughts and underlying beliefs in written form. Then stop right there and be proud of yourself, because this is the step that’s actually hardest to get yourself to do! After you’re done giving yourself a high five, pick one phrase to focus on. 

Step 2: one step towards 

Take one step TOWARDS the anxiety/anxious part by asking: “How is this thought or belief, or the part that is pushing this anxious thought or belief, helping? If it’s not helping, how is it really (really!) trying to help me?” 

Step 3: the magic button litmus test 

Ask yourself if you’d push the magic button to get rid of this forever, even if you would have to also get rid of all of the positive things you just identified in step 2. Then ask yourself, is it an easier sell if it’s not a button, but a dial?  

(It’s always a dial. There is no magic button.  

...And I’m not even going to pretend I’m sorry, because I’m not sorry, because a dial is much, much better. We get to keep the good with this dial, hooray!  

With a dial, we get to find a sweet spot where all the good intentions and impacts we identified in #2 stay, and all your parts will eventually see that as the best-case scenario that it is!) 

Most people, at this point, without any direct efforts to turn down the dial, will notice that the dial (aka the anxiety) has already gone down – at least a bit.  

But maybe you want to turn down the dial more. (You probably want to turn down the dial more.)  

Maybe there’s still too much anxiety. 

How do we turn down that dial?  

That’s what we’re about to go back to the main blog post to answer now.  

But real quick: you might read my list of what to do to turn down the dial and think, “ but I’ve heard this all before.”  

And you probably have heard most of it here or there, in therapy or coaching or on social media.  

You might also think: “Not only have I heard it, I’ve tried it, and it hasn’t worked for me...or, it’s worked some, but here I am, reading this post, so, yeah.” 

Yes! The point of what I taught you in the workshop (and summarized here) is to make all the anxiety-reducing tools, any ones you prefer, work SO much better. It’s, like, the best lube in the world.  

(I want to remind you here that lubricant is used for many things. I’m going to let you go where you will with that; it's a lube metaphor choose-your-own-adventure.) 

So now you know the secret, the 3 steps that will guide you to turn in the opposite direction of what you’ve been taught. NOW you’re ready to make much better use of what comes next to keep turning down that dial.